Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Monday, April 27, 2009
Friday, April 24, 2009
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Monday, April 20, 2009
Friday, April 17, 2009
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Little Claudia asked her new Nana on Monday, "When you went on your honeymoon, did you find some honey?"
Monday, April 13, 2009
April has been very busy. I've been preparing for VBS, and working on Sunday school stuff. Plus the daily doings of a busy household with small children.
Now I'm in Tampa with Javier and the kids. My dad got married to Wanda on Friday. We arrived late Wednesday night in Tampa and on Thursday before the wedding we drove to Brandon and met Wanda and Paige, her four year old granddaughter.
I wondered how I would feel seeing my dad and Wanda together for the first time. You know what? It felt completely natural. I knew I would like Wanda but I just wondered how it would feel to see them together. There is something about Wanda that is comforting, warm, and a calming love you can feel.
There is much I want to share about the wedding, but I will have to come back later and write more.
Saturday we went to Jacksonville and went to my dad and now Wanda's home.
Dread filled my heart. I didn't want to go inside, but running away solves nothing. What else can one do but push forward? What was I dreading, you might wonder. Honestly, it had nothing to do with the changes. Simply put, that doesn't bother me. It had nothing to do with Wanda. It feels comforting and right that she is there. It was only about the fact that my mother wasn't going to be opening the door, waiting for me.
It was HARD. Harder than I thought to be there. Had I not had two small children and a husband there with me, I would have jumped in the car and driven straight to my mom's grave. Every fiber of my being wanted to fling myself on her grave and dig her out, screaming, "you're not supposed to be dead to us. Don't you know you're supposed to be in your house?"
I've never felt so angry about her being gone, her spirit so far away, so untouchable in heaven. I wanted her home. Greeting us in her kitchen. I could see her smile, imagine what she would say and do.
There were many bitter, angry and depressed tears. I haven't grieved like that before. I know where my mom is, my heart is set on the place where she is, my eyes focused on the goal of one day getting there myself. But Saturday's tears boiled down to pity.
I don't regret those tears or letting myself grieve like that. I know God understands and gave me the space to just simply be human.
But you know what, one can't stay in that frame of mind long. It's a dangerous, dark place that pity, depression and anger leads you. They beckon with their cold, sharp tentacles. Desperate to wrap pity around one's mind and it's a horrible trap.
Thank God for His mercy and LOVE that are stronger... that are more powerful... and more wonderful than one can imagine. Thank God for His HOPE that is fresh... that flows like river... that fills your heart and gives life!
Sunday was a new day and I woke feeling... released, renewed and refreshed. Ready for a bright new future. Worship at Southside Assembly was wonderful! I went with Jesus by my side and praised my God just steps away from where my mother's coffin once held her earthly shell. I raised my hands in VICTORY because death didn't win! Through Jesus, there is eternal life. I smiled knowing in heaven my mom was dancing along with me! I felt like I was smiling with her, knowing a wonderful secret!
Friday, April 10, 2009
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Friday, April 3, 2009
Both of us as well as our families have been blessed as God has uniquely brought us together though we all have experienced difficult loses.
God bless each of you for your love, prayers, support, and unusual kindnesses to us. Wanda and I are grateful to God for the new love He has given us and for the amazing manner that God is blending our families.
Monday, Wednesday, and Friday of next week, we will share photos that will celebrate our marriage.
On Monday, there will be a beautiful picture of Wanda and maybe a picture of the “Big Kiss”.
Here are two pretty little girls who had just met each other for the first time just moments before this picture was taken. Claudia and Paige will become new cousins Friday evening at our wedding. They will have other new cousins, but this picture was just too cute not to post. Neither of them would call Wanda Nana or me Papa as they both said that they could not do that until we were married. Tonight we will be official! HA!
The second picture was taken as they rode a Merry-Go-Round. They had a ball as they met preparing to become "new cousins", and we had fun watching little ones make new life-long relationships.
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
I am planning on a few further changes in the blog in the next days. I will begin posting on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday and will have more video’s and pictures. My desire is to use this blog to plea for the higher good through personal happenings and insights.
Those who have followed this blog and my previous writings on Kristy’s blog have been so encouraging to me as well as to my children. This has been an incredible and an amazing journey these last months, and I believe that the Lord has put within my heart new ideas and thoughts to share as I continue in the new path he has directed.
This Friday I will make an important announcement concerning my future. It will include personal interest that many of you have desired to see and hear. I have veiled my personal plans for these last weeks and several months, but this Friday you will know more details of what God is doing in my life.
God has ordered plans for each of us. I have learned that when I don’t understand what is happening in my life that He will yet working it all together for my good.
God is so good. God is so good. God is so good. He is so good to me.
Don't miss Friday’s post.